Friday, August 26, 2011

Is it all worth it?

As I'm preparing for my long run in the morning, I'm thinking about how much time and energy is invested into training. I plan my life around my running. It's Friday night and my biggest concern is turning in early and making sure I'm prepared for Saturday morning. Sacrifice comes to mind. As I nurse tight muscles and nagging aches, I wonder is all of this worth it? It's almost time for bed and I need to get a head start on laundry, prepare my heat wrap and I still have to ice my feet and have some prayer and quiet time. For a moment, I stop and think is this all worth it? My answer is unequivocally, YES!  Yes, it is worth the sore muscles, the stiffness and achiness, the loss of sleep, the fatigue, the occasional dehydration, the never ending preparing and packing and everything thing else that goes along with running and training. I've learned that every run will not be a good run, every race will not be my best race and every morning after the long run will not always be a joyous day. But that's ok. Good, bad or indifferent, I know that I am committed and in love with running. Running is about my self discovery. I can push myself to new levels, higher limits and get past my pain. Running helps me discover my strength, my endurance and my courage. Running is my therapy, my spritual journey and my love. So, when I'm tired and I just want to sleep in, I think about the experience of running and I know and know that I know that it is all worth it. 

God made the ultimate sacrifice when he sent his Son to die for our sins. Jesus made the ultimate sacrifice when he died on the cross. When I think about my Saviour's sacrifice, my heart is overwhelmed. Nothing I do, give up or sacrifice can ever compare. I realize that sometimes you have to lose some things and make sacrifices. And yes, the reward is greater than the sacrifices you make.

Gratitude Journal
I am grateful for RPM.
I am grateful for dying to self.
I am grateful that Jesus died upon the cross.
I am grateful for Girlfriends Praying. 

I have one more run this week, so let me remind you "Jesus said, If uou can believe, anything is possible to him who believes. " Mark 9:23
     Yes, Lord, I do Believe!

Monday, August 22, 2011

Week 4 SHM: Finding My Strong


Jesus said to him, "If you can believe, all things are possible to him who believes." Mark 9:23 (NKJ)

I was reading a blog on Saturday and she talked about finding her strong when things look seemingly impossible. After I finished reading the blog post, Mark 9:23 came to mind: all things are possible to him who believes.
Finding My Strong

Saturday ended a high mileage week for me. I ran nearly 25 miles (highest mileage since April). This was a tough training week. I completed a hilly run, long hill repeats, an easy run and a 10+ mile long run with nearly four of those miles being track work. Any double-digit run is tough, but especially mixed with track repeats. I remember thinking I'm only on my second set of repeats. I have one more left to go. Does anyone else want to quit? I remember thinking I want to stop, but I have to hit my splits. Instead of stopping, I started talking to myself. Pick up your feet. Quick turnover. Get the legs moving. Quick turnover equals faster pace. Remember, I told you guys a while back, I drag my feet when I'm tired and it slows me down. More foot contact time equals a slower pace, especially for someone who has short legs like me. I completed the track workout and I ran the four miles back to the Clubhouse. At times I wanted to walk and I wanted to stop, but I just kept on going. I'm Finding My Strong. I'm Finding My Strong in a combination of ways. Sometimes, I find it when I'm running alone on the track. There are other times I find it when I power up a hill and just keep on moving. There are other times I find it when I'm been pushed by other runners or simply pushing myself. However it happens, it's the way God intended. It all starts in what I Believe. If I Believe I can, then all things are possible. Finding my strong is not giving up because I'm tired or because I don't feel good or I'm uncomfortable. Finding my strong is not giving up on running because my feet hurt or my shins or sore. Finding my strong is about digging in deep and saying I can do this. Finding my strong is saying I Believe I can do this. I will overcome fear and doubt and I will Believe because "all things are possible to him who believes." That doesn't mean I won't have doubts or that I won't have bad runs. It just means that I won't let the doubts and the bad runs overcome me. God never intended for anything to take us out. On Saturday afternoon between naps, it really clicked to me what Finding My Strong is all about.

Finding my strong is about believing anything is possible.
Finding my strong is about running with endurance the race God has set before me.
Finding my strong is about depending on God's grace to give me strength in my weakness.
Finding my strong is about knowing that all things are possible through Christ who gives me strength.
Finding my strong is about my attitude, my belief, my determination and my faith to keep on running.

Finding my strong is not an option. It is my destiny and my purpose.

My gratitude journal is simple today. I am just thankful…..

Monday, August 15, 2011

Week 3 SHM: Endurance

"And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. "
Hebrews 12:1

Week 3 is all about Endurance. I have this feeling that I haven't had in a while. I had forgotten about this feeling; the one after the long run when my muscles hurt and I'm tired. Last week was tough training. It was my highest mileage week since May and Saturday I ran my longest long run since May. Endurance. That's what I'm training towards. I'm working towards better endurance. Each day I put on my running shoes is a new day to test my endurance. How will I stand up on my next run? 

Week 3 is more miles, more hill repeats and more track work. It's more time in training and more time on my feet. It's only Week 3, but I need to declare Hebrews 12:1. I need to believe that I can endure another test, another training, another race.


Gratitude Journal
I am grateful for Sunday dinner.
I am grateful for family.
I am grateful for the month of August.
I am grateful I can step, walk and run foward.
I am grateful I have grace to endure.

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Week 2: Confidence

Week 1 is in the books and on to Week 2 of Training. A quick recap of last week:
1) Got in some good miles.
2) Pushed myself a more on every run.
3) Battled with dehydration a couple of days(I swear I saw stars for a quick second on Wednesday morning).
4) Need to purposefully hydrate.
5) Learned a little more about confidence.

Things happen when you develop confidence in God and your ability. I started this week with a victor’s attitude and not one of doubt and defeat. On Friday morning, I realized my left foot wasn’t hurting and my shins were not sore. I don’t exactly know what I did last week. I just know I’m doing a lot of things differently. I’m more disciplined with my foam rolling and stretching and I’m more dedicated to strengthening and stretching

The problems with my feet and lower legs have been an issue since I started this half-marathon journey (Remember, the physical therapist who told me I just wasn’t made to run distance). Well, quite the contrary. God made me to run distance. He allowed my struggles and my obstacles to strengthen me. What I perceived as a problem, he’s developing into one of my strengths. I remember the week before my race in April when someone spoke words into my spirit. She said, once you let go of the fear, you’ll start to run without restrictions. When you start to run freely and get rid of the anxiety, the strongholds will break away and you’ll begin to run your best. He’ll restore to you what was taken. Lord, I’ve finally let go of the anxiety and I Believe You. The weight is finally lifting and my running is turning around. I realize I have the power and the strength to run distance. I realize it’s not about me but something greater.

Last week I declared without a doubt, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (Philippians 4:13).” I Believe that. This week, I am going to have the attitude of Paul.

“Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12: 8 -9a (NIV)

God’s grace is sufficient through the storms, the struggle and the strain. Instead of taking this cup from me, he gave me grace, strength and power to overcome the enemy. It is in my weakness that I am made strong. I’m running in what I Believe and I’m embracing my weaknesses as a part of the process to get to my purpose.


Gratitude Journal
I am grateful for revelations and confirmations.
I am grateful for friendship.
I am grateful for the start of a cooler season.
I am grateful for discipline.
I am grateful for sleep.

Sunday, July 31, 2011

Half Marathon Number Three




It's Training Week 1! For the next 14 weeks, I'll be training for the Savannah Rock 'n Roll Half Marathon. Training requires discipline, focus and commitment. It also requires believing in yourself and in your goals. When I started this running journey, I had no destination in mind. I had a goal and decided to attempt to reach it. But in this year of running, I've learned more than how to be an endurance runner. I've learned how to follow God.

As I'm planning my goals for this upcoming training season, my most important goal is to Believe. If you don't Believe, then how can you expect to reach or attain your goals or the thing God has placed into your spirit? Believe. That's my motivation and my motto for this training season. Believe in God. Believe in Self. Believe.
 
Over the next 14 weeks, I've decided to select a scripture for each mile of the race to motivate, encourage and inspire me to the finish line. Week 1 is stamina training:

Mile 1 –" I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" Philippians 4:13 (NKJ)

Gratitude Journal
I am grateful for hot chamomile tea.
I am grateful I can hope and pray.
I am grateful for girlfriends.
I am grateful I know how to cook.
I am grateful for the things in life that test you.
I am grateful that I have courage to try and not stop running.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

PUSH


With each half-marathon I've completed, the training and races have brought forth new perspectives and  revelations for me. I'm beginning a new training season. During this past year of running half marathons and training, I've realized how my running mirrors my spiritual walk. Now, God is revealing to me my ability to push myself. It's often said that people give up just before the breakthrough. When I'm running, the last few miles are always the hardest. Sometimes my legs feel like logs (or a sack of bricks). It's miserable. My legs feel heavy and it takes so much energy to get one foot in front of the other. There are some runs when I can't catch my breath or my breathing feels out of control and it scares me. I don't like that feeling so I back off. I've even walked to try to catch my breath. Once I feel like I'm back in control then I can try running again. Recently, Joel Osteen's words are in my mind, "Don't make a permanent decision based on a temporary feeling." Some personal trainers insist that their clients feel the burn. I've never operated under that theory. I push to failure or fatigue depending on how I feel that day. Again, those words ring in my head, "Don't make a permanent decision based on a temporary feeling." As a runner, I'm never going to get better until I push through that momentary fatigue, weakness and pain.
PUSH. I've heard it before. Jada, you don't PUSH yourself. PUSH. Memories flood my mind of my mama's words about applying myself and not settling for that B grade, I STILL Want That A. Jada, just PUSH yourself a little bit harder and a little bit longer. Stop running with doubt because of the way you feel right now. This feeling is temporary. So, PUSH. When you feel like stopping and giving up, PUSH harder. Running is teaching me so much about myself. During the times when I am flat out exhausted, I find if I keep going there is always just a little more in me. I just needed to PUSH. Maybe, that's what it means to activate your faith. My revelation: Activating your faith is digging down so deep inside and pulling out something that you didn't know existed. God in his infinite wisdom planned our lives and allowed situations and circumstances to PUSH us and bring forth his purpose in us. What's the saying? "Without struggle, there will be no progress?" Well, sometimes God has to force us into a place that doesn't feel good. Before I started running, I couldn't imagine running five miles not to mention running 13.1 miles. Running a 5K felt good. It wasn't too hard. It was something I could handle. Had I stayed comfortable only running a 5K, I would not have realized my strength and my endurance to run a longer distance. I know the heavy feeling and running on empty. I know the feeling when your breath is out of control and you just feel like you have to stop. I also know you shouldn't "make a permanent decision based on a temporary feeling." If we give up too soon, we'll never see the purpose realized or the revelations give birth. We'll be just like the people of Israel walking in circles in the wilderness.
In the last few weeks, my running has taught me that it's time to PUSH. It's time to dig in deep and block out the insecurities and PUSH. I'll never realize my potential or my purpose if I run only in my comfort zone. There is a story in the Bible about the woman with the issue of blood. As she pushed her way through the crowd, she pressed on and pursued her healing miracle. The Bible says that when she touched Jesus, she was immediately made whole. Jesus asked His disciples, "Who touched me?" But the disciples were very baffled and said to Him, "Master, look at the crowd around You and You ask, 'Who touched me?'" "No," He said, "someone has touched me with faith because virtue has left My body" (see Mark 5:30-31). As she touched Jesus, God rewarded her. The Bible says that she came forward and confessed everything, and then Jesus said to her: "Daughter, your faith has made you well. Go in peace" (Mark 3:34, NKJV).
The woman with the issue of blood had one goal in mind – to get healing. By faith, she PUSHED her way through the crowd towards the one who could heal her, Jesus. Today, I've decided to PUSH. I've decided to PUSH myself and run outside my comfort zone. I know the end result will be a better, stronger, faster runner.
Push Forward, Push Past. Push (andPray) Until Something Happens.

Reference: Press Toward the Mark

Gratitude Journal
I am grateful for the journey.
I am grateful that I have felt the fatigue and felt the burn.
I am grateful I am ready to PUSH.
I am grateful that I had to learn to PUSH. 
I am grateful for the wonderful God I serve.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Here I AM


I like to run. On most days, I love to run. On other days, I really don't know how I feel about running. After my second half-marathon, I went through a period of discouragement. I was tired; tired of the running; tired of the sacrifice; tired of the early mornings; tired of the preparations; and, tired of people counting on me to get things done. I think I lost my passion. I let weariness set in in more ways than one. Just last week, I found myself saying, " Lord, I'm tired." I'm tired of the demands and the stress and the need to keep everything together. I'm tired. I haven't been blogging much and I have been neglecting my dedicated prayer and quiet time. This break in my quality time with my Heavenly Father caused me to slip into a place I don't want to go or like to be in. Today, while working out, I listened to a Joel Osteen podcast entitled; Your Second Wind is on the Way. How befitting a title and a message! On Saturday's group run, the comment was made that at the end of my run, I seem to come up with this "kick". I perfect my running stride, my running form and the last meters look effortless. Where does this come from? I've been conditioned and trained to finish strong.

Joel Osteen's sermon made some good points and also referenced running as examples. Sometimes, you are tempted to give up. Sometimes, you allow fatigue to set in and you grow weary and stop pushing and stop trying. But, he reminded me, it's at those times, when you must fix your eyes on the prize and keep pressing. Press your way through the pain. Press your way through the uncomfortable feelings. Press your way through the miles ahead. There were times during training, when I thought my chest would explode and my lungs were on fire. I remember my first training days when I was so tired I couldn't think straight. Everything below my waist would hurt, but I would show up and run even though all I wanted was just one run not to hurt so badly or leave me feeling so sore afterwards. By the time I starting training for half-marathon number two, I noticed my body didn't feel that bad. I could complete a nine-mile run and not have to take a 3-hour nap! My body was becoming stronger. I didn't realize the subtle changes initially, but after a while the hills didn't feel the same. The miles didn't tear me down. The track workouts didn't leave me ready to kick rocks and be done. Training was preparing me ~ breaking me down yet building me back up stronger, renewed and restored.

I'm recognizing each training session was a season of preparation and difficulty. It was designed to push my endurance. It was a time of pushing my body to limits that I didn't and I still don't like. It was a time of running hill repeats, track workouts, tempo runs and long runs. It was a time of learning to run on tired legs. There comes a point when fatigue sets in, but you have to keep running. I've started to notice that I have a tendency to shuffle my feet when I'm tired; my posture changes and my stride changes. I can't afford to drag my feet. It cost me time and it costs me energy --wasted energy. I think I get that extra kick because I can sense or see that the end of the run (or race) is near. On my tired and fatigued legs, I force myself to get it together and correct my stride. That's my extra kick, that second wind that Joel Osteen preached about. When you see me at the end of a race and most runs, you wouldn't realize the struggle I just went through. You can't see the pain I had to push through. You only see the makings of a runner with good form and a beautiful stride.

I'm "preparing" for my third half-marathon and about to start training in two more weeks. My attitude is different. See, I've run, made it through, two half-marathons all ready. It wasn't easy. It didn't feel good. It was difficult. At times I questioned myself and my ability. But, I made it. I made it through 13.1 miles. I'm running half-marathon number three on faith. This course will be one that I will not get to preview first so I can't prepare for the hills ahead or get ready for the straight-a-ways and curves. I must rely on my faith to get through and my determination not to quit. Tired is just a mindset. It's just a battle of the mind. God has given me strength to attack the uphills, navigate the downhills and cruise through the straight-a-ways. It's not about looking ahead and figuring out the course of the 13.1 miles. It's about using my strength and His power to get through each mile without growing weary or faint. I'm taking one mile at a time, and allowing (trusting) God to renew my strength for the miles ahead. This Runner Girl is running the miles ahead on faith and finishing strong.

Quitting is a permanent decision based on a temporary feeling.
God has given me the grace for the season I'm in.
~ Pastor Joel Osteen


Gratitude Journal
I am grateful for electricity.
I am grateful for God's grace.
I am grateful I can run a mile.
I am grateful that God is my comfort, my strength and my refuge.

Here I AM by Marvin Sapp